Landon's in the hospital again, and though it stinks, I'm thankful for the time with him, time to be still and reflect. I could be doing other things (sometimes feel stressed and guilty about the other things I'm not able to do!) but MY SON IS IN THE HOSPITAL - that's my priority and I need to remember and settle with that. Hospital stays and medical complications have become such a norm, this may sound strange, but it's easy to minimize and feel like just another thing. This stay has been like that and I'm glad for the wake up call. Not in an emergency way, but reflectively!
Friday, November 4, 2016
Posted by Jennie at 12:44 PM
Tuesday, September 27, 2016
Posted by Jennie at 9:42 PM
Monday, June 13, 2016
This might sound a bit odd, but stick with me! God answers prayer in the strangest circumstances sometimes!
Posted by Jennie at 10:13 PM
Monday, April 11, 2016
I've started this post several times but haven't had the time, or the clarity to put it all together til now. I'm so thankful for the way God works - when we can see the puzzle pieces falling into place! Hopefully this comes out as it is in my head and my heart!
Posted by Jennie at 12:38 AM
There's been a lot more going on at work and outside of work, (it's IEP season for 3 kids, finishing some home projects, Owen's trying 2's, to name a few...) and it's not uncommon for me to feel behind the ball a bit. Collectively, it feels like the kids have known the buttons to push and when my stress level are high, so when to strike! I know, they're also triggered by my stress but when I'm feeling like that, logic isn't really top of mind.
Some of those talks went ok, but the change didn't last long (because they're young!), other times they were filled with emotions. In one of those emotion-filled conversations with Hailey, she said it's just hard having 5 kids, I didn't see what she needed, etc...and she was right. She knows she needs to be a team player (and is in so many ways!!), but looking back, she also needs to feel seen and heard. The stress and emotions are catchy and Landon starts crying, Owen runs and gets into what seems like everything. So easily, Brennan gets extra upset by all the energy in the house in the moment and has a hard time calming down. Brooke talks louder to be heard and comes into the room, everyone's tolerance is low - and now we have a chaotic time. Moments like this I crave the quiet and the still water mentioned in Psalm 23:2.
But today I realized, the rest of the verse - I don't happen upon the still water, the Shepherd leads me beside still water. I need to be following the Shepherd and be listening for Him. In church today we sang Oceans, by Hillsong...here's the lyrics I really needed -
I was hoping for my eyes to stay above the waves on my own, but I need the Shepherd to lead me to the still water and I need to recognize I can't do it on my own, I need to call upon His name. I will find my rest in Him. I've felt pretty drained and let the things I'm doing add stress because I'm not finding daily "fill me up" rest in His embrace. At church today, I really thought, has it really been a week since we've been to church?! It has! I need His embrace to keep me even keel - above the waves.
I wrote an apology letter to Hailey during quiet time and she wrote one back and gave me a deep hug, telling me how much she loved me. Brooklyn finished up her all about me questionnaire tonight and she was asked who do you admire - and she said mom. I'm thankful for the fill me up today! My joy, my rest and my strength comes from You. Not just in the big, but EVERYday!
Posted by Jennie at 12:38 AM
Friday, January 1, 2016
Posted by Jennie at 12:00 AM